GOOD THOUGHTS

 

                        

                               WATCH YOUR THOUGHTS

                     TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE, ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS TIP THE SCALES BY GIVING 51 PERCENT LOVE THROUGH YOUR GOOD THOUGHTS AND GOOD FEELINGS. ONCE YOU REACH THE TIPPING POINT OF GIVING MORE LOVE THAN NEGATIVITY. THE LOVE THAT COMES BACK TO YOU THEN MULTIPLIES ITSELF BY ATTRACTING MORE LOVE THROUGH THE LAW OF ATTRACTION. SUDDENLY YOU EXPERIENCE AND ACCELERATION AND MULTIPLICATION OF GOOD THINGS! INSTEAD OF MORE NEGATIVE THINGS COMING BACK TO YOU AND BEING MULTPLIED IN EVER AREA OF YOUR LIFE. AND THIS IS THE WAY YOUR LIFE IS SUPOSSED TO BE.

                      WHEN YOU WAKE UP EACH MORNING, YOU ARE STANDING AT THE TIPPING POINT OF YOUR DAY. ONE WAY TIP YOU INTO A WONDERFUL DAY FILLED WITH GOOD THINGS, AND THE OTHER WAY TIPS YOU INTO A DAY FILLED WITH PROBLEMS. YOU ARE THE ONE WHO DETERMINES WHAT YOUR DAY WILL BE - BY THE WAY THAT YOU FEEL! WHATEVER YOU'RE FEELING IS WHAT YOU'RE GOING AND WITH CERTAINLY, THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU WILL RECEIVE BACK IN YOUR DAY, SURROUNING YOU WHEREVER YOU GO.

                 AS YOU BEGIN YOUR DAY AND YOU'RE FEELING HAPPY, WHILE KEEP FEELING HAPPY, YOUR DAY WILL BE GREAT! BUF IF YOU BEGIN YOUR DAY IN A BAD MOOD, AND YOU DO NOTHING TO CHANGE IT YOUR DAY WILL NOT BE GREAT AT ALL.

                  ONE DAY OF GOOD FEELINGS NOT ONLY CHANGES YOUR DAY. IT CHANGES YOUR TOMORROW, AND YOUR LIFE! PROVIDED YOU MAINTAIN YOUR GOOD FEELINGS AND YOU GO TO SLEEP FEELING GOOD, YOU BEGIN THE NEXT DAY WITH A MOMENTUM OF GOOD FEELINGS. AS YOU CONTINUE DAY AFTER DAY, YOUR LIFE GETS BETTER AND BETTER.

                  "  LIVE TODAY, NOT YESTERDAY, NOT TOMORROW.

                    FUST TODAY. INHABIT YOUR MOMENTS. DON'T RENT

                    THEM OUT OF TOMORROW".

                                                                                      --- JERRY SPINELLI

                        SO MANY PEOPLE DON'T LIVE FOR TODAY. THEY ARE COMPLETELY CONSUMED  WITH THE FUTURE, AND YET IS HOW WE LIVE TODAY THAT CREATES OUR FUTURE, IT IS WHAT YOU FEE TODAY THAT MATTES, BECAUSE IT IS THE ONLY THING THAT DETERMINES YOUR FUTURE. EVERY DAY IS AN OPPORTUNITY FOR A NEW LIFE. BECAUSE EVERY

 SINGLE DAY YOU STAND AT THE TIPPING POINT OF YOUR LIFE. AND ON ANY ONE DAY YOU CAN CHANGE THE FUTURE - THROUGH THE WAY THAT YOU FEEL. WHEN YOU TIP THE BALANCE TO GOOD FEELINGS, THE FORCE OF LOVE WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE SO FAST THAT YOU WILL SCARCELY BELIEVE IT.

                  POINTS :

                  * EVERYTHING IN THE UNIVERSE IS MAGNETIC AND EVERYTHING HAS A MAGNETIC FREQUENCY, INCLUDING YOUR THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS.

                 * WHATEVER YOU FEEL, WHETHER GOOD OR BAD, DETERMINES YOUR FREQENCY AND YOU ATTRACT THE PEOPLE, EVENTS, AND CIRCUMSTANCES THAT ARE ON THE SAME FREQUENCY.

                 * CHANGE YOUR FREQUENCY AT ANY TIME NY CHANGING HOW YOU FEEL, AND EVERYTHING AROUND YOU WILL  CHANGE BECAUSE YOU'RE ON A NEW FREQUENCY.

                * IF SOMETHING NEGATIVE HAS HAPPENED IN YOUR LIFE, YOU CAN CHANGE IT . IT IS NEVER TOO LATE. BECAUSE YOU CAN ALWAYS CHANGE THE WAY YOU FEEL.

                * MANY PEOPLE PUT THEIR FEELINGS ON AUTOMATIC PILOT, THEIR FEELINGS ARE REACTIONS TO WHAT HAPPENS TO THEM. HOWEVER, DON'T REALIZE THAT IT'S THEIR FEELINGS THAT ARE THE CAUSE OF WHAT HAPPENS TO THEM.

                * TO CHANGE ANYTHING - WHETHER IT'S THE CIRCUMSTANCE OF MONEY, HEALTH, RELATIONSHIPS OR ANY SUBJECT WHATSOVER - YOU HAVE TO CHANGE THE WAY YOU FEEL!

                * BLAME, CRITICISM, FAULT, AND COMPLAINING ARE ALL FORMS OF NEGATIVITY, AND ALL OF THEM BRING BACK NOTHIG BUT STRIFE.

                * THROW OUT OF YOUR VACABULARY WORDS LIKE TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, DISGUSTING, AND ARWFUL. USE MORE WORDS LIKE FANTASTIC, AMAZING FABULOUS, BRILLIANT, AND WONDERFUL.

                 * EVEN IF YOU JUST GIVE 51 PERCENT GOOD THOUGHTS AND GOOD FEELINGS YOU HAVE TIPPED THE SCALES OF YOUR LIFE!

                  * EVERY DAY IS AN OPPORTUNITY FOR A NEW LIFE, EVERY DAY YOU STAND AT THE TIPPING POINT OF YOUR LIFE. AND ON ONE DAY YOU CAN CHANGE THE FUTURE - THROUGH THE WAY THAT YOU FEEL.

TIPS TO PERMANENT WEIGHT LOSS

 

                                        WEIGHT LOSS TIPS

                               THEY KEY TO PERFECT HEALTH CAN BE SUMMARIZED IN FIVE WORDS. EAT LESS AND EXERCISE MORE".

                               THE ONLY WAY THAT YOU CAN LOSE WEIGHT PERMANENTLY IS TO BURN OFF MORE CALORIES THAN YOU CONSUME. THERE IS NO OTHER WAY. MOREOVER, YOU CAN DO THIS ONLY OVER AN EXTENDED PERIOD OF TIME, ESPECIALLY IF YOU HAVE ALLOWED YOURSELF TO PUT ON A LOT OF EXERCISE WEIGHT.

                            IN MY PROBLEM, "THINKING BIG, WE TEACH THE IMPORTANCE OF AVOIDING THE THREE WHITE POISONS, SUGAR, SALT, AND FLOUR.

                 GET RID OF SUGAR : TO LOSE WEIGHT PERMANENTLY AND TO ENJOY HIGH LEVELS OF HEALTH AND ENERGY, YOU SHOULD ELIMINATE ALL SIMPLE SUGARS FROM YOUR DIET, SIMPLE SUGAR ARE CONTAINED  IN CANDY, CAKE, PASTRIES, DESSERTS, SOFT DRINKS, CANNED FRUITS, SUGAR IN YOUR COFFEE, AND ALL OTHER FORMS OF SUGAR THAT PEOPLE CONSUME IN LARGE QUANTITIES EVERY DAY.

                      THE FACT IS THAT YOU REQUIRE NO ADDITIONAL SUGAR TO ENJOY SUPERB LEVELS OF PHYSICAL HEALTH. SIMPLY BY ELIMINATING ALL SUGAR AND SUGAR PRODUCTS FROM YOUR LIFE, BY GOING "COLD TURKEY" ON SUGAR, YOU WILL BEGIN TO LOSE AS MUCH AS ONE POUND PER DAY.

                   PASS ON THE SALT:  IN ADDITION, YOU SHOULD ELIMINATE ALL ADDITIONAL SALT FROM YOUR DIET. ALTHOUGH THE AVERAGE AMERICAN GETS SUFFICIENT SALT IN ALL THE DIFFERENT FOODS HE EATS, HE CONSUMES AN EXTRA TWENTY POUNDS OF SALT EACH YEAR BY EATING FOODS WITH HIGH SALT CONTENT AND BY THEN ADDING ADDITIONAL SALT TO MEALS.

                  WHEN YOU CONSUME EXCESS SALT, YOUR BODY RETAINS WATER IN ODER TO HOLD THAT SALT IN SUSPENSION. WHEN YOU STOP CONSUMING EXCESS SALT AND SIMULTANEOUSLY DRINK EIGHT GLASSESS OF WATER PER DAY, YOUR BODY RELEASES ALL THE EXCESS FLUID AND YOU CAN ACTUALLY EXPERIENCE WEIGHT DROPS OF AS MUCH AS FOUR OR FIVE POUNDS IN THE FIRST DAY.

               AVOID WHITE FLOUR PRODUCTS : FINALLY, ELIMINATE ALL WHITE FLOUR PRODUCTS FROM YOUR DIET. THIS MEANS ALL BREADS, PASTRIES, PASTAS, BUNS, ROLLS, AND ANYTHING ELSE MADE WITH WHITE FLOUR.

                  WHITE FLOUR IS ACTUALLY AN "INNER SUBSTANCE" FROM WHITE ALL NUTRIENTS HAVE BEEN REMOVED AND THEN BLEACHED OUT. WHEN YOU SEE THE WORDS "ENRICHED WHITE BREAD" IT MEANS THAT THE WHITE FLOUR, WHICH IS ESSENTIALLY A DEAD FOOD MATERIAL, HAS BEEN FORTIFIED WITH ARTIFICIAL, CHEMICAL VITAMINS, ALMOST ALL OF WHAT ARE THEN DESTROYED IN THE BAKING PROCESS. THERE IS NO FOOD VALUE IN A WHITE FLOUR PRODUCT.

         

HAPPINESS IS THE TRUE MEASURE OF YOUR SUCCESS

                                 

                                          THE HAPPINESS

                        NO HORSE GETS ANYWHERE UNTIL HE IS HARNESSED.

                 NO STREAM OR GAS DRIVES ANYTHIN UNTIL IT IS CONFINED.

                        NO NIAGARA IS EVER TURNED INTO LIGHT AND POWER UNTIL IT IS 

               TUNNELED. NO LIFE EVER GROWS GREAT UNTIL IT IS FOCUSED,

                         DEDICATED, DISCIPLINED".

                                                                                                       --- HARRY EMERSON FOSDICK

                          YOUR ABILITY TO ACHIEVE YOUR OWN HAPPINESS IS THE TRUE MEASURE OF YOUR SUCCESS IN LIFE, NOTHING IS MORE IMPORTANT. NOTHING CAN REPLACE IT. IF YOU ACCOMPLISH EVERYTHING OF A MATERIAL NATURE, BUT YOU ARE NOT HAPPY, YOU HAVE ACTUALLY FAILED AT FULLFILLING YOUR POTENTIAL AS A HUMAN BEING.

                        I DESCRIBE HOW HUMAN BEINGS ARE PURPOSEFUL,STRIVING TOWARD ACHIEVING GOALS AND END RESULTS. HOWEVER, BEHIND EACH GOAL LIES ANOTHER GOAL, AND THEN STILL ANOTHER GOAL, UNTIL YOU FINALLY ARRIVE AT THE "PRIMUM MOVUM" OR FIRST - MOVING FORCE, IN HUMAN LIFE. THIS ALWAYS TURNS OUT TO BE THE DESIRE TO BE HAPPY. YOU CAN ONLY TRULY BE HAPPY WHEN YOU PRACTICE SELF-DISCIPLINE, SELF - MASTERY, AND SELF-CONTROL, IT IS ONLY WHEN YOU FEEL THAT YOU ARE IN COMPLETE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE THAT YOU ARE TRULY CONTENT. 

                  ACTION EXERCISE 

 

 

                   1. IDENTIFY THE AREAS OF YOUR LIFE IN WHICH YOU FEEL THE HAPPIEST AND THE MOST IN CONTROL. HOW COULD YOU EXPAND THEM?

                 

                   2. IDENTIFY THE AREAS OF YOUR LIFE IN WHICH YOU FEEL CONTROLLED BY OTHER PEOPLE OR FACTORS. WHAT COULD YOU DO TO RESOLVED THESE SITUATIONS?

                 

                   3. IDENTIFY THOSE AREAS IN YOUR LIFE IN WHICH THERE IS A GAP BETWEEN YOUR CURRENT LEVELS OF ACCOMPLISHMENT AND WHAT YOU WOULD REALLY LIKE TO ACHIEVE . WHAT COULD YOU DO TO BRIDGE THESE GAPS?

                   4. IDENTIFY THE MOST PRESSING NEEDS YOU HAVE TODAY THAT ARE NOT BEING FULLFILLED. HOW COULD YOU BEGIN TO SATISFY THESE DEFICIENCY NEEDS?

           

                    5. IDENTIFY THOSE ACTIVITIES THAT GIVE YOU THE GREATEST FEELING OF PERSONAL HAPPINESS, YOUR "PEAK EXPERIENCE" IN LIFE. WHAT COULD YOU DO TO INCREASE THESE MOMENTS OF HAPPINESS?

                    6. IDENTIFY THOSE AREAS IN LIFE IN WHICH YOU FEEL THE MOST DISCONTENTED. WHAT STEPS COULD YOU TAKED IMMEDIATELY TO RESOLVE THESE FEELINGS OF DISONTENT?

                    7. DEFINE "HAPPINESS" FOR YOURSELF. WHAT DOES IT MEAN? WHAT WOULD HAVE TO HAPPEN FOR YOU TO FEEL TRULY HAPPY? WHAT COULD YOU DO IMMEDIATELY TO CREATE THIS SITUATION?

YOUR WORK

 

                            THE DISCIPLINE OF WORK

                          " LEADERS AREN'T BORN, THEY ARE MADE. AND THEY ARE MADE 

         JUST LIKE ANYTHING ELSE, THROUGH HARD WORK, AND THAT'S THE PRICE

                            WE'LL HAVE TO PAY TO ACHIEVE THAT GOAL, OR ANY GOAL".

                                                                                                           --- VINCE LOMBARDI

                                     THERE IS PERHAPS NO AREA OF YOUR LIFE WHERE SELF-DISCIPLINE HAS A GREATER IMPACT OF YOUR FUTURE THAN IN YOUR WORK. YET, IF YOU'RE LIKE MOST PEOPLE, FROM THE TIME YOU START IN THE MORNING AND THEN CONTINUING THROUGH OUT THE DAY, YOU ARE SURROUNDED BY PEOPLE AND EVENTS THAT DRAW YOU AWAY FROM DOING THE THINGS THAT ARE MOST IMPORTANT. HOWEVER, IT IS THROUGH DOING YOUR MOST IMPORTANT TASKS THAT YOU MOVE ONWARD AND UPWARD, QUICKLY AND DEPENDABLY IN YOUR CAREER.

                               A GROUP OF SENIOR EXECUTIVES WAS ASKED, WHAT ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT QUALITIES THAT A PERSON WOULD NEED TO BE PROMOTED IN YOUR COMPANY? OF THESE EXECUTIVES 85 PERCENT AGREED THAT THE MOST IMPORTANT QUALITIES ARE 

                             1. THE ABILITY TO SET PRIORITIES AND WORK ON HIGH VALUE TASKS,                                     AND

                             2.  THE DISCIPLINE TO GET THE JOB DONE QUICKLY AND WELL.

                     IT SEEMS THAT THESE TWO QUALITIES ARE MORE HELPFUL FOR CAREER SUCCESS THAN ANYTHING ELSE A PERSON CAN DO. DILIGENT, DISCIPLINED, FOCUSED WORK WILL ENABLE YOU TO CONSISTENTLY AND PREDICTLY GET MORE DONE, GET PAID MORE, AND GET PROMOTED FASTER THROUGHOUT YOUR CAREER THAN THE AVERAGE PERSON.

                              LOOK THE PART DRESS

                                   FOR SUCCESS

                     FINALLY, YOU NEED TO DISCIPLINE YOURSELF TO LOOK THE PART. REMEMBER, BIRDS OF A FEATHER FLOCK TOGETHER" WHEN IT COME TO PRESENTATION, THIS MEANS THAT PEOPLE LIKE TO PROMOTE OTHERS  WHO LOOK LIKE THEM. YOUR BOSSESS ARE VERY MORE PEOPLE WHO THEY ARE PROUD TO INTRODUCE TO THEIR IN SUCH A WAY THAT YOUR BOSS WOULD BE PROUD TO TAKE YOU OUT FOR LUNCH AND INTRODUCE YOU TO OTHERS AS A REPRESENTATIVE OF HIS OR HER COMPANY.

                      EACH MORNING BEFORE YOU GO TO WORK, LOOK IN THE MIRROR AND ASK YOURSELF, DO I LOOK LIKE ONE OF THE TOP PEOPLE IN MY FIELD? IF YOU DON'T GO BACK AND CHANGE - AND KEEP CHANGING UNTIL YOU LOOK LIKE ONE OF THE TOP PEOPLE IN YOUR BUSINESS.

                          LEARN HOW TO DRESS FOR SUCCESS. READ BOOKS AND ARTICLES, OR ASK OTHERS FOR ADVICE. LOOK AT THE MOST SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE IN YOUR BUSINESS AND DRESS THE WAY THEY DO. DRESS FOR THE JOB TWO LEVELS ABOVE YOUR CURRENT JOB. REMEMEBER THAT FULLY 95 PERCENT OF THE FIRST IMPRESSION YOU MAKE ON THE OTHER PEOPLE WILL BE DETERMINED BY YOUR DRESS AND GROOMING. MAKE SURE THAT FIRST IMPRESSION - AND THEN THE SECOND AND THIRD IMPRESSIONS - ARE CONSISTENT WITH THE MESSAGE YOU WANT TO SEND.

                           MANY PEOPLE WORK THEIR ENTIRE LIVES WITHOUT REALIZING THAT BY PUTTING FORWARD A LITTLE EXTRA EFFORT, WORKING A LITTLE HARDER, AND FOCUSING ON HIGHER - VLUE TASKS, THEY COULD BECOME ONE OF THE MOST VALUABLE PEOPLE IN THEIR ORGANIZATIONS. WHEN YOU DISCIPLINE YOURSELF TO CONTINUALLY  INCREASE THE VALUE OF YOUR CONTRIBUTION TO YOUR COMPANY, YOU WILL PUT YOUR CAREER ON THE FAST TRACK AND VIRTUALLY GUARANTEE YOURSELF A WONDERFUL FUTURE.

                       IN THE NEXT CHAPTER, YOU WILL LEAR THAT YOUR WORK BEHAVIORS NATURALLY DETERMINE YOUR ASCENTION TO LEADERSHIP, AND YOU WILL SEE HOW SELF-DISCIPLINE IS ESSENTIAZL TO FULLFILLING YOUR POTENTIAL AS A LEADER.

                                 ACTION EXERCISES:

                     1. MAKE A DECISION TODAY THAT YOU ARE GOING TO BECOME ONE OF THE TOP 20 PERCENT OF PEOPLE IN YOUR COMPANY - AND YOUR INDUSTRY. WHAT SHOULD YOU OR COULD YOU DO DIFFERENTLY.?

                    2. MAKE A LIST OF EVERTHING YOU DO IN YOUR JOB AND THEN  IDENTIFY THE THREE TASKS THAT CONTRIBUTE THE GREATEST VALUE OF YOUR WORK AND COMPANY.

                   3. SET A NEW WORK SCHEDULE FOR YOURSELF AND BEGIN TO START EARLIER, WORK HARDER, AND STAY LATER UNTIL IT BECOMES A HABIT.

                   4. IDENTIFY THE MOST IMPORTANT RESULTS YOU ARE EXPECTED TO ACHIEVE IN YOUR JOB, AND THEN WORK ON THOSE RESULTS ALL DAY LONG.

                  5. DETERMINE THE PERSON WHO IS THE BEST DRESSED AND GROOMED IN YOUR COMPANY, AND THEN RESOLVE TO USE HIM/HER AS A ROLE MODEL FOR YOUR OWN APPEARANCE.

 

                   6. DECIDE TODAY THAT, FROM NOW ON, YOU ARE GOING TO ACTUALLY WORK ALL THE TIME YOU ARE AT WORK AND THAT YOU ARE GOING TO DEVELOP THE REPUTATION FOR BEING THE HARDEST WORKING PERSON IN YOUR COMPANY.

                   7. DEVELOP A SENSE OF URGENCY. RESOLVED TO MOVE FAST WHEN YOU ARE GIVEN A JOB OR OPPORTUNITY. THIS CAN  CHANGE YOUR LIFE.

SELF MOTIVATION

 

                                           MOTIVATION

                       PEOPLE WHO ARE THE MOST SUCCESSFUL AT WHETHER THEY DO ARE THOSE WHO ARE THEIR OWN BEST MOTIVATORS. THEY STAND ON THEIR OWN FEET, GET THEMSELVES MOVING, PUT THEMSELVES IN CHANGE OF THEIR OWN SUCCESS.

                      INSTEAD OF RELYIG ON THE OUTSIDE WORLD TO MOTIVATE YOU, THINK HOW MUCH BETTER IT WOULD BE IF YOU COULD ALWAYS RELY ON YOURSELF FOR THAT SAME MOTIVATION. IF YOU WIRE IN THE RIGHT WORDS TO USE WHEN YOU TALK TO YOURSELF, YOU CAN EASILY LEARN TO GIVE YOURSELF THE MOTIVATION YOU NEED, ANYTIME YOU NEED IT.

                     HERE ARE A FEW EXAMPLES. THIS FIRST SCRIPT OF SELF-TALK FOR MOTIVATION IS THE KIND OF SELF-TALK THAT IS DESIGNED TO GET YOU EMOTIONALLY "UP". IT TAKES TO YOU ABOUT YOU IN A WAY THAT GETS YOU MOVING, WHILE IT SUPPORTS THAT MOTIVATION WITH SELF-TALK THAT GIVES YOU EXTRA BELIEF IN YOURSELF. YOU ARE NOT ONLY PROGRAMING YOURSELF TO MEET THE CHALLENGE, YOU ARE ALSO GIVING YOURSELF THE EXTRA INSURANCE  OF THE ADDED BELIEF THAT YOU CAN AND WILL ACCOMPLISH THE TASK YOU ARE SETTING OUT TO DO.

                THIS IS SELF-TALK THAT ANYONE CAN USE AT ANY TIME. IT IS NOT SPECIFIC TO ANY ONE AREA OF MOTIVATION - MAKING MORE SALES, GETTING UP ON TIME, SCORING POINTS IN A BASKETBALL GAME, OR GETTING CAUGHT UP ON YOUR PAPERWORK -BUT IT WILL WORK FOR ALL OF THOSE AND MORE. THIS IS SELF-TALK THAT WILL GIVE YOUR SUBCONSCIOUS MIND A NEW SET OF DIRECTIONS THAT WILL HELP YOU MOTIVATE YOURSELF IN ANY AREA OF YOUR LIFE.

                                            TALK TO YOURSELF EVERYDAY

                          I CAN DO ANYTHING I BELIEVE I CAN DO. I'VE GOT IT AND EVERY DAY I GET MORE OF IT. I HAVE TALENT, SKILLS, AND ABILITY.

                         I SET GOALS AND I REACH THEM. I KNOW WHAT I WANT OUT OF LIFE. I GO AFTER IT AND I GET IT.

                         PEOPLE LIKE ME, AND I GEEL GOOD ABOUT MYSELF. I HAVE A SENSE OF PRIDE IN WHO I AM AND I BELIEVE IN MYSELF.

                        NOTHING SEEMS TO STOP ME. I HAVE A LOT OF DETERMINATION. I TURN PROBLEMS INTO ADVANTANGES. I FIND POSSIBILITIES IN THINGS THAT OTHER PEOPLE NEVER GIVE A CHANCE.

                         I HAVE A LOT OF ENERGY - I AM VERY ALIVE I ENJOY LIFE AND I CAN TELL IT TO CAN OTHERS. I KEEP MYSELF UP, LOOKING AHEAD, AND LIKING IT.

                         I KNOW THAT I CAN ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING I CHOOSE, AND I REFUSE TO LET ANYTHING NEGATIVE HOLD ME BACK OR STAND IN MY WAY.

                        I AM NOT AFRAID OF ANYTHING OR ANYMORE. I HAVE STRENGTH, POWER, CONVICTION, AND CONFIDENCE. I LIKE CHALLENGES AND I MEET THEM HEAD-ON, FACE-TO-FACE  TODAY ESPECIALLY.

                     I AM ON TOP OF THE WORLD AND I'M GOING FOR IT. I HAVE A CLEAR PICTURE IN MY MIND OF WHAT I WANT. I CAN SEE IT IN FRONT OF ME. 

                     I KNOW WHAT I WANT AND I KNOW HOW TO GET IT. I KNOW THAT IT'S ALL UP TO ME AND I KNOW ICAN DO IT.

                      ROADBLOCKS DON'T BETTER ME. THEY JUST MEAN THAT I AM ALIVE AND RUNNING, AND I'M NOT GOING TO STAND STILL FOR ANYTHING.

                      I TRUST MYSELF, I'VE NOT GOING TO STAND STILL FOR ANYTHING. 

                      I TRUST MYSELF, I'VE GOT WHAT IT TAKES - PLENTY OF IT - AND I KNOW HOW TO USE IT. TODAY MORE THAN EVER. TODAY I AM UNSTOPPABLE I'VE GOT MYSELF TOGETHER AND I'M GETTING MORE TOGETHER EVERY DAY. AND TODAY - LOOK OUT WORLD, HERE I COME. 

                                 TRY READING TO YOURSELF AND LOUND EACH MORNING. WOULDN'T IT BE WONDERFUL IF WE HAD SOMEONE WHO BELIEVED IN US TO MUCH THAT EACH DAY WE COULD COUNT ON BEING TOLD THOSE INCREDIBLE, MOTIVATING TRUTHS ABOUT OURSELVES? IF WE HAD THAT, WE WOULD CERTAINLY HAVE THE TRUST AND FRIEND WE COULD EVER FIND.

                                THE TRUTH IS, OF COURSE, WE DO HAVE THAT FRIENDS, EACH OF US DOES. RIGHT HERE INSIDE OURSELVES. ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS ASK AND OUR FRIEND WILL BE THERE, WITHOUT FAIL, AT ANY TIMED, ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.

                            

IMPORTANT HINT TO OUR RELATIONSHIPS

 

                CORRECTIVE FEEDBACK CAN

                            MAKE OUR RELATIONSHIPS.

                              IT IS STRANGE THAT SWORD AND WORDS HAVE THE SAME LETTERS.

                              EVE  MORE STRANGE IS THAT THEY HAVE THE SAME EFFECT IT

                              NOT HANDLED PROPERLY".

                                                                                                                   --- ANONYMOUS

                          MOST OF THE TIME OUR FRUSTRATION COMES FROM IMPROPER DEALSINGS IN OUR RELATIONSHIPS, I SAID TRYIG TO CONSOLE HARRY. AND THIS STEMS FROM OUR POOR COMMUNICATION, WHETHER IT'S OUR BODY LANGUAGE, ACTIONS OR WORDS, WE MUST TAKE FULL RESPONSIBILITY FOR OUR RELATIONSHIPS, I CONTINUED.

                             BUT IF I'M ALWAYS THINKING ABOUT WHAT TO SAY TO NOT UPSET, MY WIFE, THAT WOULD MAKE LIFE MISERABLE AND SO CALCULATED, HARRY RETORTED.

                              I SIGNED. HARRY YES, WE MUST CHOOSE OUR WORDS CAREFULLY WHEN WE ARE CORRECTING OTHERS, BUT BEFIRE THAT WE MUST LEARN TO INVES APPRECIATION IN THEM".

                              I SETTLED DOWN TO EXPLAIN IN DETAIL. 

                                          CORRECTIVE FEEDBACK: AN ART

                  BEYOND ANY OTHER NEED, THE GREATEST LONGING OF EVERY INDIVIDUALS IS TO GIVE LOVE AND TO BE LOVED. IT IS OUR RELATIONSHIPS THAT ALLOW THIS MANTRA TO COME TO FRUITION. HOWEVER, IT IS SURPRISING THAT THE RELATIONSHIPS WE CHERISH AND KEEP SO CLOSE TO OUR HEART CAN EASILY BE NEGLECTED AND ABUSED. FOR THE MOST PARTS, THIS IS NOT DONE ON PURPOSE, BUT OUT OF IGNORANCE AND AN INABILITY TO UNDERSTAND HOW ONE SHOULD BEHAVE. WE MAY HAVE THE RIGHT INTENTIONS BUT GIVING ADVICE INAPPROPRIATELY MAY DO MORE HARM THAN GOOD. THAT IS WHAY WE MUST LEARN TO DO IT PROPERLY. AND IT TAKES PRACTICE AND INTROPECTION TO DEVELOP THIS ABILITY. ANY TIME YOU FEEL THE NEED TO GIVE CORRECTIVE FEEDBACK TO SOMEONE, THINK OF THESE FOUR QUESTIONS.

                                      AM I RIGHT PERSON TO GIVE 

                                         CORRESTIVE FEEDBACK?

                    IS IT APPROPRIATE FOR YOU TO CORRECT THAT PERSON? THERE IS A JOKE THAT EVERY WOMAN THINKS THAT THE BEST CHILD IN THE WORLD IS HER CHILD, AND EVERY MAN THINKS THAT THE BEST WIFE IN THE WORLD IS THE NEIGHBOUR'S WIFE. WE WOULD ALL SCREAM AT SOMEONE ELSE'S CHILD WHO IS ABOUT TO INJURE ITSELF, BUT WE ARE NOT TALKING OF THOSE EXCEPTIONAL SITUATIONS. IN ANY OTHER SITUATION WOULD YOU GIVE CORRECTIVE FEEDBACK TO SOMEONE ELSE'S CHILD? WOULD YOU GIVE FEEDBACK TO ANOTHER'S SPOUSE? IN MOST SITUATIONS, YOU WOULD NOT. THEREFORE WE HAVE TO THINK, AM I THE RIGHT PERSON TO GIVE THIS FEEDBACK OR IS SOMEONE ELSE BETTER SUITED? AM I A RELATIVE? AM I A FRIEND? AM I AN AUTHORITY IN ANY WAY TO GIVE CORRECT FEEDBACK? IF THE ANSWER TO ANY OF THE QUESTIONS IS YES, THEN YOU CAN PROCEED TO THE NEXT ONE.

                     DO I HAVE THE RIGHT MOTIVE TO 

                                               GIVE CORRECTIVE FEEDBACK?

                      IT IS SAID THAT WE CAN CONTROL TWO THINGS IN OUR LIFE, OUR DESIRES AND OUR MOTIVES TELL US WHY WE WANT IT. IN MANY CASES, WE MAY CORRECT OTHERS BECAUSE WE WANT TO SETTLE OLD ACCOUNTS. WE MAY HAVE A GRUDGE AGAINST THEM AND WE MAY USE THE OPPORTUNITY TO CORRECT THEM, SIMPLY TO EXACT OUR VENGEANCE. BUT THIS SHOULD NOT BE OUR MOTIVE. IT SHOULD BE TO HELP THEM AS FRIEND. WE SHOULD BE CONSCIENTIOUS THAT OUR MOTIVE IS APPROPRIATE, WE WANT TO HELP THEM COME OUT OF THE WRONG THEY ARE DOING. FEEDBACK FROM A PLACE OF LOVE MAY SEEM UNPALATABLE, BUT IT TASTES THE SWEETEST IF DONE APPROPRIATELY AND HAS THE RIGHT EFFECT.

                         TAKING THE TIME TO ASK THESE FOUR QUESTIONS BEFORE GIVING SOMEBODY CORRECTIONAL FEEDBACK CAN CHANGE ONE'S LIFE. TO UNDERSTAND THEM DEEPLY, CONTEMPLATION AND DISCUSSION WITH SOMEONW MORE EXPERIENCED THAN ONESELF ARE REQUIRED AS EVERY SITUATION IS DIFFERENT. THE PRINCIPLES REMAIN THE SAME IN EVERY SITUATION, BUT THE APPLICATION MAY VARY ON A CASE-TO-CASE BASIS, DEPENDING ON THE GRAVITY OF THE SITUATION OR EVEN OUR RELATIONSHIPWITH THE PERSON. WE WOULD OUR CHILDREN. ONE SIZE DOES NOT FIT ALL, NEITHER DO OUR METHODS TO CORRECT.

                      THIS PRACTICE WILL TAKE SOME TIME TO IMPLEMENT, AND FORM INTO A HABIT, HARRY SAID, AS HE LOOKED AWAY FROM THE STEERING WHEEL MOMENTARILY TO LOOK AT ME.

                        YOU'RE RIGHT , I NODDED. HAVING THE KNOWLEDGE OF SOMETHING IS FAR FROM MASTERING IT. GIVING FEEDBACK BADLY IS AN ADDICTION . JUST AS A SMOKER KNOWS THAT CIGARETTERS CAN KILL HIM BUT SMOKES NONETHELESS, SIMILARLY THE WAY WE INTERACT WITH OTHERS BECOMES AN ADDICTION. WE KNOW WHEN WE ARE CARELESS, BUT OUR HABITS FORCE US TO ACT IN A CERTAIN  WAY.

                         HARRY'S EXPRESSION REVERTED TO ONE I HAD SEEN EARLIER IN THIS CAR JOURNEY. HIS FACE DROPPED AND HIS BREATHING SLOWED. WHEN I RETURN FROM THE OFFICE I AM USUALLY STRESSED, HE WHISPERED IAM NOT LIKE THAT GUY IN THE STORY. I REALLY LASH OUT OVER TRIVIAL COULD LEAD UP TO WHAT HAPPENED THE OTHER NIGHT. LALITA AND I GOT INTO A HUGE ARGUMENT OVER SOMETHING TRIVIAL WHICH I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER NOW. THE FIGHT REACHED ITS CRESCENDO, AND SHE SCREAMED AT ME SAYING SHE WANTED A DIVORCE! DIVORCE? HOW CAN SHE WANT A DIVORCE AFTER ALL WE HAVE BEEN THOUGHT? AT THIS POINT. HARRY WAS TALKING TO HIMSELF, CHURNING HIS EMOTIONS. WHAT WOULD MY FAMILY THINK IF I GOT DIVORCED? WOULD MY FRIENDS JUDGE ME? I SUPPOSE BEING CARELESS ABOUT LITTLE THINGS CAN REALLY PROVE TO BE FATAL. BUT I REALLY DO LOVE MY WIFE, AND I KNOW I NEED TO CHANGE, BUT HOW CAN I EVER FORGIVE HER FOR SAYING SOMETHING SO CRUEL AND HURTFUL?

                            ANOTHER QUESTION LOADED WITH EMOTION, I THOUGHT TO MYSELF. I LOOKED OUT OF THE CAR WINDOW. WE WERE DRIVING PAST COUPLES HOLDING HANDS AND WALKING ALONG WITH COASTLINE. I SAID, LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT SOMETHING WORSE".

OUT THOUGHTS MAKES US WHAT WE ARE

 

                             LISTEN OUR THOUGHTS

                     A FEW YEARS AGO, I WAS ASKED TO ANSWER THIS QUESTION ON A RADIO PROGRAM: WHAT IS THE BIGGEST LESSON YOU HAVE EVER LEARNED?

                        THAT WAS EASY. BY FAR THE MOST VITAL LESSON I HAVE EVER LEARNED IS THE IMPORTANCE OF WHAT WE THINK. IF I KNEW WHAT YOU THINK, I WOULD KNOW WHAT YOU ARE. OUR THOUGHTS MAKE US WHAT WE ARE. OUR MENTAL ATTITUDE IS THE X FACTOR THAT DETERMINES OUR FATE. EMERSON SAID, A MAN IS WHAT HE THINKS ABOUT ALL DAY LONG". HOW COULD HE POSSIBLY BY ANYTHING ELSE?

                       I NOW KNOW WITH A CONVICTION BEYOND ALL DOUBT THAT THE BIGGEST PROBLEM YOU AND I HAVE TO DEAL WITH - IN FACT, ALMOST THE ONLY PROBLEM WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH - IS CHOOSING THE RIGHT THOUGHTS, IF WE CAN DO THAT, WE WILL BE ON THE HIGHROAD TO SOLVING ALL OUR PROBLEMS. THE GREAT PHILOSOPHER WHO RULED THE ROMAN EMPIRE. MARCUS AURELIUS, SUMMED IT UP IN EIGHT WORLDS - EIGHT WORDS THAT CAN DETERMINE YOUR DESTINY. "OUR LIFE IS WHAT OUR THOUGHTS MAKE IT".

                          YES IF WE THINK HAPPY THOUGHTS, WE WILL BE HAPPY. IF WE THINK MISERABLE THOUGHTS, WE WILL BE MISERABLE. IF WE THINK FEAR THOUGHTS, WE WILL BE FEARFUL. IF WE THINK SICKLY THOUGHTS, WE WILL PROBABLY BE ILL. IF WE THINK FAILURE, WE WILL CERTAINLY FAIL IT. WE WALLOW IN SELF-PITY, EVERYONE WILL WANT TO SHUN US AND AVOID US. "YOU ARE NOT", SAID NORMAN VINCENT PEALE" YOU ARE NOT WHAT YOU THINK YOU ARE, BUT WHAT YOU THINK, YOU ARE".

                          AM I ADVOCATING HABITUAL POLLYANNA ATTITUDE TOWARD ALL OUR PROBLEM? NO, UNFORTUNATELY LIFE ISN'T SO SIMPLE AS ALL THAT. BUT I AM ADVOCATING THAT WE ASSUME A POSITIVE ATTITUDE  INSTEAD OF A NEGATIVE ATTITUDE. IN OTHER WORDS, WE NEED TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT OUR PROBLEMS, BUT NOT WORRIED. WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN CONCERN AND WORRY? LET ME ILLUSTRATE. EVERY TIME I CROSS THE TRAFFIC-JAMMED STREETS OF NEW YORK, I AM CONCERED ABOUT WHAT I AM DOING - BUT NOT WORRIED, CONCERN MEANS REALIZING WHAT THE PROBLEMS ARE, AND CALMLY TAKING STEPS TO MEET THEM. WORRYING MEANS GOING AROUND IN MADDENING, FUTILE CIRCLES.

                     JUST FOR TODAY I WILL BE UNAFRAID, ESPECIALLY I WILL NOT BE AFRAID TO BE HAPPY, TO ENJOY WHAT IS BEAUTIFUL, TO LOVE, AND TO BELIEVE THAT THOSE I LOVE, LOVE ME.

                     IF WE WANT TO DEVELOP A MENTAL ATTITUDE THAT WILL BRING US PEACE AND HAPPINESS, HERE IS RULE!

              THINK AND ACT CHEERFULLY, AND YOU WILL FEEL CHEERFUL

                        "I AM SO FAR FROM BEING A PESSIMIST-- ON THE CONTRARY,

                        IN SPIRTE OF MY SCARS, I AM TICKLED TO DEATH AT LIFE".

                                                                                                                 --- EUGENE O NEILL

                        IF YOU LOOK INTO YOUR OWN HEART, AND YOU FIND NOTHING WRONG THERE, WHAT IS THERE TO WORRY ABOUT?

                                            WHAT IS THERE TO FEAR?"

                                                                                                                --- CONFUCIUS