AWAY FROM FEARS

 

               

                       ELIMINATE TWO FERS AT ONCE

                      PSYCHOLOGISTS HAVE FOUND THAT CERTAIN FEARS ARE BUNDLED TOGETHER IN THE SUBCONSCIOUS MIND, LIKE WIRES ON THE SAME CIRCUIT. IF YOU CAN OVERCOME YEAR FEARS IN ONE OF THESE AREAS, YOU WILL ALSO ELIMINATE OTHER FEARS ON THE SAME CIRCUIT.

                     THE FEAR OF REJECTION, OR CALL RELUCTANCE, SEEMS TO BE BUNDLED TOGETHER WITH THE FEAR OF PUBLIC SPEAKING. WHEN YOU DISCIPLINE YOURSELF TO JOIN TOATMASTERS OR TAKE A DALE CARNEGIE COURSE TO LEARN TO SPEAK CONFIDENTLY ON YOUR FEET, YOUR FEARS OF REJECTION DISAPPEAR AS WELL. YOUR LEVEL OF SELF-CONFIDENCE IN ALL YOUR INTERACTIONS WITH OTHERS INCREASES DRAMATICALLY. YOUR WHOLE LIFE CHANGES IN A POSITIVE WAY.

                                CONFRONT YOUR FEARS

               YOUR ABILITY TO CONFRONT, DEAL WITH, AND ACT IN SPITE OF YOUR FEARS IS THE KEY TO HAPPINESS AND SUCCESS. ONE OF THE BEST EXERCISE YOU CAN PRACTICE IS TO IDENTIFY A PERSON OR SITUATION IN YOUR LIFE OF WHICH YOU ARE AFRAID AND RESOLVE TO DEAL WITH THAT FEAR SITUATION IMMEDIATELY. DO NOT ALLOW IT TO MAKE YOU UNHAPPY FOR ANOTHER MINUTE. RESOLVE TO CONFRONT THE SITUATION OR PERSON AND PUT THE FEAR BEHIND YOU.

              A WOMAN IN ONE OF MY SEMINARS TOLD ME THAT HER BOSS WAS A VERY NEGATIVE PERSON. HE WAS CONSTANTLY CRITICIZING AND BERATING HER ABOUT HER WORK, EVEN THOUGH SHE WAS ONE OF THE HIGHEST-RATED EMPLOYEES IN THE ORGANIZATION. HE WAS MAKING HER LIFE MISERABLE. SHE DIDN'T WANT TO GIVE UP HER JOB, BUT SHE WAS AFRAID OF CONFRONTING HIM. SHE ASKED ME WHAT SHE SHOULD DO.

 

                  I GAVE HER THIS ADVICE, WHICH I HAVE SUBSEQUENTLY GIVEN TO MANY OTHER PEOPLE. THE ONLY REASON THAT ONE PERSON BULLIES ANOTHER IS HE FEELS HE CAN GET AWAY WITH IT. THE ONLY WAY TO DEAL WITH A BULLY IS TO CONFRONT HIM. BULLIES ARE ACTUALLY COWARDS AT HEART, AND THEY WILL FLEE FROM A CONFRONTATION.

                   I TOLD HER TO DO THIS, THE NEXT TIME YOUR BOSS CRITICIZES YOU FOR ANY REASON, TURN TO HIM AND SAY, QUITE FIRMLY, "I WOULD APPRECIATE IF YOU NOT TALK TO ME LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN. IT HURTS MY FEELINGS AND STOPS ME FROM DOING MY JOB THE WAY YOU WANT".

                I TOLD HER TO LOOK HIM STRAIGHT IN THE EYE AFTER SHE HAD FINISHED MAKING THIS STATEMENT. SHE HAD TREMENDOUS COURAGE. RATHER THAN PUTTING UP WITH THIS SITUATION ANY LONGER, THE NEXT TIME HER BOSS BEGAN TO BERATE HER, SHE SQUARD OFF WITH HIM AND SAID THOSE WORDS.

                 SHE WROTE TO ME AND TOLD ME WHAT HAD HAPPENED. JUST AS I HAD PREDICTED, HE STOPPED DEAD IN HIS TRACKS. HE IMMEDIATELY APOLOGIZED AND MUMBLED AND THEN QUICKLY WENT BACK TO HIS OFFICE. HE NEVER CRITICIZED HER AGAIN. SHE TOLD ME THAT SHE COULD HAVE ENDED HIS BAD TREATMENT OF HER MANY MONTHS BEFORE IF SHE HAD ONLY HAD THE COURAGE TO CONFRONT HIM DIRECTLY THE FIRST TIME IT HAPPENED.

                              MOVE TOWARD THE FEAR

                     WHEN YOU IDENTIFY A FEA AND DISCIPLINE YOURSELF TO MOVE TOWARD IT, IT GROWS SMALLER AND MORE MANAGEABLE. WHAT'S MORE, AS YOUR FEARS GROW SMALLER, YOUR CONFIDENCE GROWS. SOON, YOUR FEARS LOSE THEIR CONTROL OVER YOU.

               IN CONTRAST, WHEN YOU BACK AWAY FROM A FEAR-INDUCING SITUATION OR PERSON, YOUR FEAR GROWS LARGER AND LARGER. SOON IT DOMINATES YOUR THINKING AND FEELING, PREOCCUPIES YOU DURING THE DAY, AND OFTEN KEEPS YOU AWAKE AT NIGHT.

                               POINTS TO UNDERSTAND 

              1. IDENTIFY YOUR THREE BIGGEST FEARS IN LIFE, RIGHT NOW. WHAT ARE THEY?

             2. DETERMINE WHAT YOU WOULD DO IN EACH OF THESE SITUATION IF YOU WERE GUARANTEED OF COMPLETE SUCCESS. WHAT ACTIONS WOULD YOU TAKE?

              3. WHAT HAVE YOU ALWAYS WANTED TO DO BUT BEEN AFRAID TO ATTEMPT? WHAT WOULD YOU DO DIFFERENTLY IF YOU WERE GUARANTEED SUCCESS?

             4. IN WHAT THREE AREAS OF LIFE AND WORK DO YOU MOST EXPERIENCE THE FEARS OF FAILURE AND LOSS? WHAT STEPS COULD YOU GUARANTEED SUCCESS?

             5. IN WHAT THREE AREAS OF LIFE DO YOU MOST EXPERIENCE THE FEARS OF CRITICISM, REJECTION, OR EMBARRASSMENT? HOW COULD YOU CONFRONT THESE FEARS AND OVERCOME THEM?

              6. WHAT ONE GREAT GOAL WOULD YOU SET FOR YOURSELF IF YOU KNEW YOU COULD NOT FAIL?

                7. WHAT WOULD YOU DO DIFFERENTLY IN LIFE IF YOU HAD $20 MILLION IN THE BANK, BUT ONLY TEN YEARS LEFT TO LIVE?

COMMUNICATION SKILLS

  

                                       MALE-FEMALE 

                          COMMUNICATION SKILLS

                  MEN AND WOMEN ARE DIFFERENT IN MANY WAYS. ACCORDING TO MRI SCANS, WHEN MEN COMMUNICATE, THEY USE ONLY TWO CENTERS OF THEIR BRAINS. WHEN WOMEN COMMUNICATE, THEY USE SEVEN CENTERS OF THEIR BRAINS. IT IS AS THOUGH MEN HAVE TWO HEADLIGHTS WITH WHICH TO COMMUNICATE, WHEREAS A WOMAN'S BRAIN IS LIKE A FULLY LIT CHRISTMAS TREE.

                  MEN CAN PROCESS ONLY ONE SENSORY INPUT AT A TIME, WHEREAS WOMEN CAN PROCESS ONLY ONE SENSORY INPUTS. WHEN A MAN IS WATCHING TELEVISION, HE DOES NOT SEE OR HEAR ANYTHING ELSE, INCLUDING WORDS SPOKEN TO HIM FROM THE SIDE OR BEHIND. HE BECOMES TOTALLY FIXATED ON THE VISUAL IMAGES AND WORDS ON THE SCREEN.

                  WHEN A MAN IS DRIVING A CAR, HE HAS TO TURN DOWN THE RADIO TO READ THE MAP. HE HAS TO TURN DOWN THE TELEVISION OR RADIO TO ANSWER THE TELEPHONE. HE CANNOT READ AND LISTEN OR WATCH AT THE SAME TIME. MEN CAN DO MANY THINGS EXTREMELY WELL, BUT THEY CAN DO ONLY ONE THING AT A TIME MEN TEND TO BE VERY FOCUSED.

                  WOMEN, ON THE OTHER HAND, CAN TALK, MAKE DINNER, WATCH TELEVISION, READ THE DAY'S MAIL, AND TALK TO HER CHILDREN OR HUSBAND ALL AT ONCE. THEY ARE MULTIMENSIONAL AND CAN PROCESS SEVERAL INPUTS  STIMULTANEOUSLY. THEY CAN TALK AND LISTEN AT THE SAME TIME AND BE AWARE OF WHAT OTHER PEOPLE AROUND THEM ARE DOING AND SAYING.

                   WOMEN ARE RELATIONSHIP EXPERTS. THEY ARE VERY SENSITIVE TO OTHER PEOPLE. WHEN A MAN AND WOMAN ATTEND A SOCIAL GATHERING, WITHIN TEN MINUTES, THE WOMAN WILL HAVE DONE AN ANALYSIS AND ASSESSMENT OF THE SITUATION OF EACH OF THER OTHER PEOPLE IN THE ROOM. IN CONTRAST, THE MAN ACCOMPANYING THE WOMAN WILL HAVE NOTICED LITTLE OR NOTHING. THIS IS BECAUSE MEN ARE SIMPLE AND STRAIGHTFORWARD IN THEIR THINKING, WHEREAS WOMAN ARE COMPLEX, AWARE OF SMALL DETAILS, AND EXTEMELY SENSITIVE TO THE DYNAMICS AND NUANCES OF THE RELATIONSHIPS OF THE PEOPLE AROUND THEM.

                   A MAN CAN CALL HIS WIFE ON THE PHONE AND SAY, "HELLO" ALTHOUGH SHE HAS ONLY HEARD ONE WORD, SHE WILL IMMEDIATELY ASK, "WHAT'S WRONG? SHE CAN PICK UP A WEALTH OF MEANING AND EMOTION FROM A SINGLE WORD ON THE PHONE OR A SINGLE GLANCE OR LOOK WHEN HE WALKS IN THE DOOR.

                            RELATIONSHIP-BUILDING

                                     TAKES EFFORT

                  BECAUSE OF THE MANY DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN, IT TAKES TREMENDOUNS DISCIPLINE TO BUILD AND MAINTAIN A LONG-TERM, LOVING, AND HAPPY RELATIONSHIP.

               PERHAPS THE MOST IMPORTANT AREA OF MUTUAL COMPATIBILITY HAS TO DO WITH THE DISCIPLINE OF LISTENING. IT IS ONLY WHEN TWO PEOPLE TAKE THE TIME TO LISTEN CLOSELY AND CAREFULLY TO EACH OTHER WHEN THEY SPEAK THAT THE LINES OF COMMUNICATIONS STAY OPEN, AND THIS IS WHEN LOVE AND HARMONY CONTINUE IN THE RELATIONSHIP.

                      THERE ARE FOUR SIMPLE DISCIPLINE OF EFFECTIVE LISTENING. THERE ARE MOSTLY OF IMPORATANCE TO MEN, WHO ARE NOTORIOUSLY POOR LISTENERS, ESPECIALLY WITH THE WOMEN IN THEIR LIVES. THIS IS NOT BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT INTERESTED. IT IS SIMPLY BECAUSE THEIR MINDS ARE FOCUSED ON SOMETHING ELSE AND THEY ARE EASILY DISTRACTED.

                       THE DISCIPLINES OF LISTENING

                        LISTEN ATTENTIVELY. THE FIRST DISCIPLINE IS TO LISTEN ATTENTIVELY, WITHOUT INTERRUPTING. LISTEN AS THOUGH THE OTHER PERSON IS ABOUT TO REVEAL GREAT SECRET OR THE WINNING LOTERY NUMBER AND YOU WILL HEAR IT ONLY ONCE.

                        WHEN SHE WANTS TO TALK TO YOU, IF YOU ARE A MAN, PUT ASIDE ALL POSSIBLE DISTRACTIONS. TURN OFF THE TELEVISION OR RADIO. PUT DOWN THE NEWSPAPER OR MAIL. FACE HER DIRECTLY, LEAN SLIGHTLY FORWARD, AND CONCENTRATE SINGLE-MINDEDLY ON WHAT SHE IS SAYING.

                    AFFECTION IS EXPRESSED BY PAYING TOTAL ATTENTION TO HER WHEN SHE SPEAKS. SINCE YOU ALWAYS PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT YOU MOST VALUE, WHEN YOU PAY CLOSE ATTENTION TO ANOTHER PERSON WHILE SPEAKS, YOU TELL THAT PERSON THAT SHE IS OF GREAT VALUE TO YOU. THIS SATISFIES THE DEEPEST SUBCONSCIOUS NEEDS OF A WOMAN - TO FEEL VALUABLE, IMPORTANT, AND RESPECTED.

                  PAUSE BEFORE REPLYING . THE SECOND DISCIPLINE OF LISTENING IS TO PAUSE BEFORE REPLYING. TAKE A FEW SECONDS TO CAREFULLY CONSIDER WHAT HED OR SHE HAS SAID. WHEN YOU PAUSE, YOU AVOID THE RISK OF INTERRUPTING THE OTHER PERSON IF SHE IS JUST REFORMULATING HER THOUGHTS . YOU TELL HER THAT YOU VALUE WHAT SHE SAID AND THAT YOU ARE GIVING HER WORDS CAREFUL CONSIDERATION.

                ANOTHER ADVANTAGE OF PAUSING, OF ALLOWING A SILENCE IN THE CONVERSATION. IS THAT IT ENABLES YOU TO HEAR NOT ONLY WHAT WAS SAID, BUT ALSO WHAT WAS NOT SAID OR WHAT WAS SAID BETWEEN THE LINES. THE ACTUAL MESSAGE SOAKS INTO A DEEPER LEVEL OF YOUR MIND, ENABLING YOU TO UNDERSTAND BETTER AND TO THEREFORE RESPOND WITH GREATER AWARENESS AND SENSITIVITY.

                ASK CLARIFICATION. THE THIRD DISCIPLINE OF EFFECTIVE LISTENING IS TO QUESTION FOR CLARIFICATION. NEVER ASSUME THAT YOU AUTOMATICALLY KNOW WHAT THE OTHER PERSON IS THINKING OR FEELING, INSTEAD, IF YOU ARE AT ALL UNCLEAR SIMPLY ASK, 

                       HOW DO YOU MEAN? OR HOW DO YOU MEAN, EXACTLY? 

                        IT IS WHEN YOU ASK QUESTIONS AND SEEK CLARITY AND MEANING THAT YOU DEMONSTRATE TO THE OTHER PERSON THAT YOU REALLY CARE ABOUT WHAT HE OR SHE IS SAYING, AND THAT YOU ARE GENUINELY INTERESTED IN UNDERSTANDING HOW HE OR SHE THINKS AND FEELS.

THE REWARD OF PERSISTENCE

 

                      SELF-DISCIPLINE AND PERSISTENCE

                 " BEWARE OF ENDEAVORING TO BECOME A GREAT MAN IN A HURRY.

                                ONE SUCH ATTEMPT IN 10,000 MAY SUCCEED.

                                                   THESE ARE FEARFUL ODDS".

                                                                                             --- BENJAMIN DISRAELI

                      PERSISTENCE IS SELF-DISCIPLINE IN ACTION. YOUR ABILITY TO PERSIST IN THE FACE OF ALL SETBACKS AND TEMPORARY FAILURES IS ESSENTIAL TO SUCCESS IN LIFE.

                    NAPOLEAN HILL SAID, "PERSISTENCE IS TO THE CHARACTER OF MAN AS CARBON IS TO STEEL". THE PRIMARY REASON FOR SUCCESS IS PERSISTENCE, AND LIKEWISE, THE PRIMARY REASON FOR FAILURE IS LACK OF PERSISTENCE, QUITTING TOO SOON.

                  THERE IS A DIRECT LINK BETWEEN SELF-DISCIPLINE AND SELF-ESTEEM. EACH TIME YOU DISCIPLINE YOURSELF TO DO WHAT YOU SHOULD DO, WHEN YOU SHOULD DO IT, WHETHER YOU FEEL LIKE IT OR NOT, YOUR SELF-ESTEEM INCREASES. THIS WHY THERE IS DIRECT RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN SELF-ESTEEM AND PERSISTENCE. EACH TIME YOU PERSIST AND FORCE YOURSELF TO CONTINUE ON, EVEN WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE QUITTING, YOUR SELF-ESTEEM GOES UP.

                   EACH ACT OF SELF-DISCIPLINE STRENGTHENS EVERY OTHER ACT OF SELF-DISCIPLINE. EVERY ACT OF PERSISTENCE STRENGTHENS  EVERY OTHER ACT OF PERSISTENCE. WHEN YOU DISCIPLINE YOURSELF TO PERSIST, OVER AND OVER, YOU LIKE AND RESPECT YOURSELF MORE AND MORE. YOU BECOME STRONGER AND MORE CONFIDENT. EVENTUALLY, YOU BECOME UNSTOPPABLE.

                        THE REWARD OF PERSISTENCE

                     PERSISTENCE IS ITS OWN REWARD. EVERY TIME YOU FORCE YOURSELF TO PERSIST ON A TASK, WHETHER IT IS LARGE OR SMALL, YOU FEEL HAPPIER AND BETTER ABOUT YOURSELF.

                   WHEN YOU GO THE EXTRA MILE AND DO MORE THAN YOU ARE PAID FOR OR MORE THAN IS EXPECTED, YOUR SELF-ESTEEM GOES UP. YOU FEEL MORE POWERFUL AND IN GREATER CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE. IN YOUR CAREER, WHEN YOU GO THE EXTRA MILE YOU PUT YOURSELF ON THE SIDE OF THE ANGLES. THE PRIMARY DIFFERENCE BETWEEN WINNERS AND LOSERS IN LIFE IS SIMPLE. WINNERS NEVER QUIT, AND QUITTERS NEVER WIN.

                 YOU CAN INCREASE YOUR ABILITY TO PERSIST BY TALKING TO YOURSELF POSITIVELY. SAY THESE WORDS. "I AM UNSTOPPABLE!" BEFORE YOU BEGIN ANY MAJOR UNDERTAKING, PREPROGRAM YOURSELF BY TELLING YOURSELF, I NEVER GIVE UP".

                  BEFORE YOU CAN ACHIEVE ANYTHING WORTHWHILE IN LIFE, YOU HAVE TO PASS "THE PERSISTENCE TEST". THIS IS USUALLY A "SNAP QUIZ" SPRUNG ON YOU UNEXPECTEDLY WITH NO WARNING. YOU SUDDENLY FACE A MAJOR SETBACK, PROBLEM, TEMPORARY FAILURE, OR EVEN A COMPLETE DISASTER. WHEN THIS HAPPENS, REMIND YOURSELF THAT THIS IS THE "TESTING TIME". THIS IS WHEN YOU DEMONSTRATE WHAT YOU ARE REALLY MADE OF. THIS IS WHEN YOU SHOW YOURSELF AND OTHERS THE STRENGTH OF YOUR CHARACTER AND YOUR TRUE DETERMINATION TO SUCCEED.

                              YOUR ABILITY TO RESPOND

                    YOUR ABILITY TO RESPOND EFFECTIVELY TO SETBACKS - YOUR LEVEL OF "RESPONSE-ABILITY"- IS THE MEASURE OF YOUR READINESS TO SUCCEED. WHEN YOU EXPERIENCE A MAJOR SETBACK OR PROBLEM, YOU WILL FEEL TEMPORARILY STUNNED. THIS FEELING IS VERY MUCH LIKE A PUNCH IN THE EMOTIONAL SOLAR PLEXUS. YOU WILL BE STOPPED FOR A FEW SECONDS OR A FEW MINUTES. DURING THIS  PERIOD, YOU WILL OFTEN FEEL DISCOURAGED OR EXPERIENCE SELF-PITY. YOU WILL SAY, "WHY ME"?

                  HOWEVER, IT IS NOT HOW FAR YOU FALL THAT COUNTS, BUT RATHER BUT HIGH YOU BOUNCE. YOUR AIM IS TO BOUNCE BACK AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE. RESILIENCE IN THE FACE OF UNEXPECTED REVERSALS IS VITAL TO LONG-TERM SUCCESS. REMEMBER THE WARRIOR'S CRIED. "I WILL LAY ME DOWN TO BLEED A WHILE, AND THEN RISE AND FIGHT AGAIN".

                  DON'T BE SURPRISED, SHOCKED, OR SET BACK WHEN THINGS GO WRONG. YOUR BEST - LAID PLANS WILL OFTEN FALL APART. INSTEAD, EXPECT DISSAPOINMENTS AND SETBACKS AS A PART OF LIFE. TAKE A DEEP BREATH, PICK UP THE PIECES, AND CONTINUE ONWARD.

                    OPTIMISM GIVES YOU RESILIENCE

                   THE MOST IMPORTANT QUALITY YOU NEED FOR SUCCESS AND PERSISTENCE IS OPTIMISM. THIS IS A BOUNDLESS CONFIDENCE IN YOURSELF AND YOUR ABILITY TO ULTIMATELY SUCCEED. TO REMAIN OPTIMISTIC, YOU MUST CONTROL AND DISCIPLINE YOUR THINKING WHEN THINGS GO WRONG. REFUSE TO FEEL SORRY FOR YOURSELF. REMEMBER, YOU ARE NOT A VICTIM. YOU ARE A ADULT, AND YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF YOUR OWN LIFE. YOU ARE DOING WHAT YOU HAVE FREELY CHOSEN TO DO. SETBACKS COME WITH THE TERRITORY. THEY ARE MERELY SPEED BUMPS ON THE ROAD TO SUCCESS.

                  REFUSE TO BLAME OTHERS OF MAKE EXCUSES. WHEN YOU COMPLAIN OR BLAME OTHER PEOPLE, IT JUST MAKES YOU FEEL AND SOUND PETTY AND SMALL, AND, WHAT'S WORSE, IT TAKES AWAY YOUR PERSONAL POWER. WHENEVER YOU CRITICIZE OR COMPLAIN, IT FEELS YOU WEAKER AND REDUCES YOUR ABILITY TO DEAL EFFECTIVELY WITH THE SITUATION. INSTEAD, GREET EVERY SETBACK BY REPEATING, "I AM RESPONSIBLE".

                  LOOK FOR THE REASONS WHY YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT HAPPENED RATHER THAN TRYING TO PASS OFF THE BLAME ONTO OTHER PEOPLE

TRICKS TO BECOME SUCCESS IN BUSINESS

                       SELF-DISCIPLINE AND BUSINESS

               "  THE QUALITY OF SELF DENIAL IN THE PURSUIT OF A LONGER TERM GOAL,

                 AND INDEED, THE WILLPOWER TO MAINTAIN THAT LEVEL OF SELF DENIAL 

                                IS AN EXCELLENT TRAINING FOR THE BOARDROOM".   

                                                                                --- JOHN VINEY

 

                         MOST PEOPLE WILL WORK IN OR FOR A BUSINESS OR OWN A BUSINESS IN THE COURSE OF THEIR LIFETIMES. THE ACHIEVEMENT OF BUSINESS DEMANDS HIGH LEVELS OF DISCIPLINE FROM YOU IN EVERY AREA OF BUSINESS ACTIVITY, BOTH LARGE OR SMALL. WITHOUT SELF-DISCIPLINE AND SELF-CONTROL IN BUSINESS, NO SUCCESS IS POSSIBLE.

                       THERE IS NO AREA OF ACTIVITY THAT DEMANDS MORE SELF-DISCIPLINE THAN STARTING AND OPERATING BUSINESS IN OUR CURRENT ECONOMY.

                      THE FIRST LAW OF ECONOMICS IS SCARCITY. AS A RULE, THERE IS NEVER ENOUGH OF ANYTHING FOR EVERYONE WHO WANTS IT. SPECIFICALLY, THERE ARE NEVER ENOUGH CUSTOMERS FOR YOU TO SELL EVERYTHING YOU WANT TO SELL. THERE ARE NEVER ENOUGH SALES REVENUES TO HELP YOU ACHIEVE ALL YOUR FINANCIAL GOALS. THERE ARE NEVER SUFFICIENT PROFITS TO ENABLE YOU TO EXPAND AS MUCH AS YOU WANT. ESPECIALLY, THERE ARE NEVER ENOUGH GOOD PEOPLE TO WORK WITH AND FOR YOU TO HELP YOU ACHEIVE YOUR BUSINESS GOALS.

                              THE LAW OF COMPETITION

                     IF THE FIRST LAW OF ECONOMICS IS SCARCITY, THEN THE FIRST LAW OF BUSINESS IS COMPETITION. IT REQUIRES TREMENDOUS FOCUS AND DISCIPLINE TO DO THE THINGS NECESSARY TO ATTRACT THE SCARCE MONEY OF CUSTOMERS TOWARD PURCHASING YOUR PRODUCT OR SERVICE.

                   TO NOT ONLY SURVIVE BUT ALSO THRIVE, YOU MUST COMPETE CONTINUALLY AGAINST ALL OTHER USES OF THE SAME AMOUNT OF MONEY THAT YOU WANT TO CHARGE FOR WHAT YOU SELL.

                   THE FIRST DISCIPLINE OF BUSINESS SUCCESS IS THAT YOU OFFER A PRODUCT OR SERVICE THAT PEOPLE WANT, NEED, AND WILL PAY FOR AT A PRICE THEY WILL ACCEPT - A PRICE THAT IS COMPETITIVE WITH EVERY OTHER BUSINESS THAT THE SAME CUSTOMER DOLLER.

                  YOU MUST BE COMPLETELY HONEST WITH YOUR PRODUCT/SERVICE MIX TO ENSURE THAT IT IS WELL SUITED TO THE CURRENT MARKET. THIS IS AN AREA WHERE FALSE ASSUMPTIONS OR INCORRECT CONCLUSIONS CAN LEAD TO BUSINESS FAILURE. THIS ANSWER IS CONTINUALLY CHANGING AS COMPETION AND CUSTOMER TASTES ALSO CHANGE.

                     THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT

                     EVERY WEEK, I SPEAK BUSINESS PEOPLE WHO ARE UNHAPPY WITH THEIR LEVEL OF SALES AND PROFITABILITY. THEY INSIST THAT THEIR PRODUCT OR SERVICE IS EXCELLENT IS EXCELLENT AND THAT PEOPLE SHOULD BE BUYING FROM THEM IN MUCH LARGER QUANTITIES. IN EACH CASE, I HAVE TO GENTLY POINT OUT TO THEM THAT THE ONLY PROOF THEIR PRODUCT OR SERVICE IS TRULY ATTRACTIVE OR VALUABLE IS THAT PEOPLE BUY IT WILLINGLY - AND THEN BUY IT AGAIN AND TELL THEIR FRIENDS TO BUY IT AS WELL.

                    ACCORDING TO THE EXPERTS, FULLY 70 PERCENT OF YOUR BUSINESS DECISIONS WILL TURN OUT TO BE WRONG IN THE FULLNESSOF TIME.THIS IS THE AVERAGE. WHEN YOU ARE A NEW BUSINESS PERSON OR STARTING A NEW BUSINESS, YOU WILL BE WRONG EVEN MORE OFTEN THAN THIS. IT IS NOT UNUSUAL FOR AN ENTREPRENEUR TO BE WRONG 90 PERCENT OF THE TIME IN THE BEGINNING OF HIS CAREER.

                    IT REQUIRES TREMEDOUS SELF-DISCIPLINE AND CHARACTER TO FACE THE POSSIBILITY YOU COULD BE WRONG IN YOUR MOST CHERISHED ASSUMPTIONS AND BELIEFS. NONETHELESS, THIS DISTAKES, CUT YOUR LOSSES, AND REDIRECT YOUR RESOURCES TOWARD OFFERING CUSTOMERS MORE OF THE THINGS THAT THEY REALLY WANT, NEED, AND ARE WILLING TO PAY FOR TODAY.

                      ALL BUSINESS INVESTMENT AND BUSINESS START-UPS REQUIRE A HIGH LEVEL OF OPTIMISM. YOU MUST BELIEVE IN THE FUTURE POSSIBILITIES OF YOUR BUSINESS ALONG WITH YOUR NEW PRODUCTS AND SERVICES. YOU MUST HAVE SO MUCH CONFIDENCE IN THEIR MARKETABILITY THAT YOU ARE WILLING TO UNDERTAKE FINANCIAL RISK AND INVEST MANY HOURS, WEEKS, AND EVEN YEARS TO ACHEIVE YOUR BUSINESS GOALS, AND YOU MUST DO ALL THIS WITH NO REAL GUARANTEE OF SUCCESS.

                     ALL THE SAME TIME, YOU NEED DISCIPLINE TO CURB YOUR CONFIDENCE, TO REMAIN OBJECTIVE AND REALISTIC. OVERCONFIDENCE IN BUSINESS CAN LEAD TO BUSINESS MISTAKES, FINANCIAL LOSSES, AND EVEN BANKRUPTCY.

KNOWLEDGE TO BECOME SUCCESS

 

THE ENERGY OF YOUR MIND

 

                            

                             WHAT MAKES YOU TIRED

              HERE IS AN ASTOUNDING AND SIGNIFICANT FACT. MENTAL WORK ALONE CAN'S MAKE YOU TIRED. SOUNDS ABSURD. BUT A FEW YEARS AGO, SCIENTISTS TIRED TO FIND OUT HOW LONG THE HUMAN BRAIN COULD LABOR WITHOUT REACHING "A DIMINISHED CAPACITY FOR WORK", THE SCIENTIFIC DEFINITION OF FATIGUE. TO THE AMAZEMENT OF THESE SCIENTISTS, THEY DISCOVERED THAT BLOOD PASSING THROUGH THE BRAIN, WHEN IT IS ACTIVE, SHOWS TO FATIGUE AT ALL! IF YOU TOOK BLOOD FROM THE VEINS OF A DAY LABORER WHILE HE WAS WORKING, YOU WOULD FIND IT FULL OF "FATIGUE TOXINS" AND FATIGUE PRODUCTS. BUT IF YOU TOOK A DROP OF BLOOD FROM THE BRAIN OF AN ALBERT EINSTEIN, IT WOULD SHOW NO FATIGUE WHATEVER AT THE END OF THE DAY.

               SO FAR AS THE BRAIN IS CONCERNED, IT CAN WORK "AS WELL AND AS SWIFTLY AT THE END OF EIGHT OR EVEN TWELVE HOURS OF EFFORT AS AT THE BEGINNING". THE BRAIN IS UTTERLY TIRELESS.. SO WHAT MAKES YOU TIRED?

                PSYCHIATRISTS DECLARE THAT MOST OF OUR FATIGUE DERIVES FROM OUR MENTAL AND EMOTIONAL ATTITUDES. ONE OF ENGLAND'S  MOST DISTINGUISHED PSYCHIATRISTS. J.A.HADFIELD SAYS IN HIS BOOK THE PSYCHOLOGY OF POWER "THE GREATER PART OF THE FATIGUE FROM WHICH WE SUFFER IS OF MENTAL ORIGIN, INFACT EXHAUTION OF PURELY PHYSICAL ORIGIN IS RARE". ONE OF AMERICA'S MOST DISTINGUISHED PSYCHIATRISTS, DR.A.A. BRILL, GOES EVEN FURTHER. HE DECLARES, "ONE HUNDRED PERCENT OF THE FATIGUE OF THE SEDENTARY WORKER IN GOOD HEALTH IN DUE TO PSYCHOLOGIAL FACTORS, BY WHICH WE MEAN EMOTIONAL FACTORS".

]

                  WHAT KINDS OF EMOTIONAL FACTORS TIRE THE SEDENTARY (OR SITTING) WORKER? JOY? CONTENTMENT? NO! NEVER ! BOREDOM, RESENTMENT, A FEELING OF NOT BEING APPRECIATED, A FEELING OF FUTILY, HURRY, ANXIETY, WORRY - THOSE ARE THE EMOTIONAL FACTORS THAT EXHAUST THE SITTING WORKER, MAKE HIM SUSCEPTIBLE TO COLDS, REDUCE HIS OUTPUT, AN SEND HIM HOME WITH A NERVOUS HEADACHE. YES, WE GET TIRED BECAUSE OUT EMOTIONS PRODUCE NERVOUS TENSIONS IN THE BODY.

                    THE METROPOLITAN LIFE INSURANCE COMPANY POINTED THAT OU IN A LEAFLET ON FATIGUE. "HARD WORK BY ITSELF" SAYS THIS GREAT LIFE-INSURANCE COMPANY, "SELDOM CAUSES FATIGUE WHICH CANNOT BE CURED BY A GOOD SLEEP OR REST... WORRY, TENSENESS, AND EMOTIONAL UPSETS ARE THREE OF THE BIGGEST CAUSES OF FATIGUE. OFTEN THEY ARE ARE TO BLAME WHEN PHYSICAL OR MENTAL WORK SEEMS TO BE THE CAUSE.. REMEMBER THAT A TENSE MUSCLE IS A WORKING MUSCLE . EASE UP! SAVE ENERGY FOR IMPORTANT DUTIES".

                 "  SOMETIMES PEOPLE LET THE SAME PROBLEM MAKE THEM

                   MISERABLE FOR YEARS WHEN THEY COULD JUST SAY, SO WHAT,

                   THAT'S ONE OF MY FAVORITETHINGS TO SAY. SO WHAT".

                                                                               ---- ANDY WARHOL

                   DONT WORRY ABOUT THE HORSE BEING BLIND, JUST LOAD

                   THE WAGON.

                                                            ----- JOHN MADDEN

LOVE YOUR LIFE

 

                        

                       TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU LOVE

                       WHEN YOU TALK ABOUT ANY DIFFIFCULTIES WITH MONEY, A RELATIONSHIP, AN ILLNESS, OR EVEN THAT THE PROFITS OF YOUR BUSINESS ARE DOWN, YOU ARE NOT TALKING ABOUT WHAT YOU LOVE. WHEN YOU TALK ABOUT A BAD EVEN IN THE NEWS, OR A PERSON OR SITUATION THAT ANNOYED OR FRUSTRATED YOU, YOU ARE NOT TALKING ABOUT WHAT YOU LOVE. TALKING ABOUT THE BAD DAY YOU HAD, BEING LATE FOR AN APPOINTMENT, GETTING CAUGHT IN TRAFFIC, OR MISSING THE BUS ARE ALL TAKING ABOUT WHAT YOU DON'T LOVE. THERE ARE MANY LITTLE THINGS THAT HAPPEN EACH DAY, IF YOU GET CAUGHT UP IN TALKING ABOUT WHAT YOU DON'T LOVE EVERY ONE OF THOSE LITTLE IN TALKING ABOUT WHAT YOU DON'T LOVE, EVERY ONE OF THOSE LITTLE THINGS BRINGS MORE STRUGGLING AND DIFFICULTY TO YOUR LIFE.

                        YOU HAVE TO TALK ABOUT THE GOOD NEWS OF THE DAY. TALK ABOUT THE APPOINMENT THAT WENT WELL. TALK ABOUT HOW YOU LOVE BEING ON TIME. TALK ABOUT HOW GOOD IT IS TO BE FULL OF HEALTH. TALK ABOUT THE PROFITS YOU WANT YOUR BUSINESS TO ACHIEVE. TALK ABOUT THE SITUATIONS AND INTERACTIONS YOU HAD IN YOUR DAY THAT WENT WELL. YOU HAVE TO TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU LOVE, TO BRING WHAT YOU LOVE TO YOU.

                    IF YOU PARROT NEGATIVE THINGS AND SQUAWK ABOUT THE THINGS YOU DON'T LOVE, YOU ARE LITERALLY JAILING YOURSELF, LIKE A PARROT IN A CAGE. EVERY TIME YOU TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU DON'T LOVE, YOU ARE ADDING ANOTHER BAR TO THE CAGE AND YOU ARE LOOKING YOURSELF AWAY FROM ALL THE GOOD.

                   PEOPLE WHO HAVE GREAT LIVES TALK MORE ABOUT WHAT THEY LOVE. NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, NO MATTER WHAT SITUATION YOU MAY BE FACING THE FORCE OF LOVE CAN SET YOU FREE!

                      "THE MEASURE OF LOVE IS LOVE WITHOUT MEASURE".

                                                                        --- SAINT BERMAND OF CHAIVAUR

                                 

                          WHEN YOU'RE FEELING JOYFUL, YOU ARE GIVING JOY, AND YOU'LL RECEIVE BACK JOYFUL EXPERIENCES, JOYFUL SITUATIONS, AND JOYFULL PEOPLE, WHEREVER YOU GO. FROM THE SMALLEST EXPERIENCES OF YOUR FAVORITE SONG PLAYING ON THE RADIO TO BIGGER EXPERIENCES OF RECEIVING A PAY RAISE - ALL OF THE CIRCUMSTANCES YOU EXPERIENCE ARE THE LAW OF ATTRACTION RESPONDING TO YOUR FEELING OF JOY. WHEN YOU'RE FEELING IRRITATED, YOU'RE GIVING IRRITATION, AND YOU'LL RECEIVE BACK IRRITATING EXPERIENCES, IRRITATING SITUATIONS, AND IRRITATION OF A MOSQUITO, TO THE BIGGER IRRITATION OF YOUR CAR BREAKING DOWN, ALL OF THESE EXPERIENCES ARE THE LAW OF ATTRACTION RESPONDING TO YOUR IRRITATION.

                    EVERY GOOD FEELING UNITES YOU WITH THE FORCE OF LOVE, BECAUSE LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF ALL GOOD FEELINGS. FEELINGS OF ENTHUSIASM, EXCITEMENT, AND PASSION COME FROM LOVE, AND WHEN YOU FEEL ANY OF THEM CONSISTENTLY, THEY GIVE YOU A LIFE FILLED WITH ENTHUSIASTIC, EXCITING, AND PASSIONATE THINGS.

                    YOU CAN HARNESS THE POWER OF A GOOD FEELING TO THE FULLEST BY TURNING UP ITS VOLUME. TO TURN UP THE VOLUME OF A FEELING, TAKE CHARGE OF IT AND DELIGHTELY UNTENSIFY IT SO YOU FEEL AS GOOD AS YOU CAN. TO AMPLIFY ENTHUSIASM, REVEL IN THE FEELING IT INTENSELY! WHEN YOU FEEL PASSION OR EXCITMENT, REVEL IN THOSE FEELINGS AND INTENSIFY THEM BY FEELING THEM AS DEEPLY AS YOU CAN. THE MORE YOU AMPLIFY YOUR GOOD FEELINGS, THE GREATER THE LOVE YOU GIVE, AND THE RESULT YOU WILL RECEIVE BACK IN YOUR LIFE WILL BE NOTHING SHORT OF SPECTACULAR.

                  WHEN YOU'RE FEELING ANY GOOD FEELING, YOU CAN ALSO AMPLIFY IT BY LOOKING FOR THINGS YOU LOVE. BEFORE SITTING DOWN TO WRITE THIS BOOK, EACH DAY I SPENT SEVERAL MINUTES AMPLIFYING MY GOOD FEELINGS. TO AMPLIFY MY GOOD FEELINGS, I THOUGHT ABOUT ALL THE THINGS I LOVE. I COUNTED THE THINGS I LOVE NONSTOP ONE AFTER THE OTHER. MY FAMILY, FRIENDS, HOME, FLOWERS IN THE GARDEN, THE WETHER, COLORS, SITUATIONS, EVENTS, AND THINGS I LOVED THAT HAPPENED DURING THE WEEK, MONTH, OR YEAR. I KEPT LISTING EVERYTHING I LOVE IN MY MIND UNTIL I FELT AMAZING. THEN I SAT DOWN TO WRITE. IT'S EASY AS THAT TO AMPLIFY YOUR GOOD FEELINGS, AND YOU CAN DO IT ANYWHERE, AT ANY TIME.